Sticks and Stones can break bones, but words can keep you FAT!

Before you get upset with the No Fat Chicks image, please note that it is the word FAT that I am discussing in this blog, not a person!

You may be familiar with my "10 Adjectives " lesson; for those who are, use this as a refresher course, for those who are hearing it for the first time--listen up!

I ask women to tell me 10 adjectives that they would use to describe themself. Take a moment and jot down 10 of your own right now. 10 words that you would use to describe yourself.

Are you doing it? come on, even if you have done it before, do it now to see where you are at today...... Come on now........10 words, 10 descriptive adjectives.

1. ___________________________



2. ___________________________



3. ___________________________



4. ___________________________



5. ___________________________



6. ___________________________



7. ___________________________



8. ___________________________



9. ___________________________



10. ___________________________

Got them down? Great. Now, read them. Does your list include any words that describe your physical appearance? Words such as "FAT"? If you read back, you will see that I did NOT ask you to tell what you LOOK like, but rather to describe yourself--WHO you are matters so much more than what you LOOK like when defining yourself which is exactly what this exercise is about; defining WHO you are, describing yourself.

If you are stuck on how you LOOK, stuck on the FAT on your body and allow it to define you; your journey to realize change is going to be a very difficult uphill battle because you are allowing FAT to be a personality trait rather than a physical condition that is easily changed.

Ever meet a person with personality issues? They can be very frustrating to deal with and I am sure it isn't much easier for them. I can think of one such person who has spent YEARS in therapy trying to come to terms with her narsistic personality traits. Sometimes WHO you are is just WHO you are; but FAT is not in any way WHO you are and it can be changed!!! Does this make sense to you?

My favorite story to illustrate why it makes so much sense to me and why I make you go through this exercise is this: A woman from NYC emailed me her list of 10 adjectives: FAT, FAT, FAT, FAT, FAT, FAT, FAT, FAT, FAT, FAT! That is WHO she saw herself as and was very upset with me when I tossed her words out and said she had to redo them and tell me about HER, about WHO she is. She corrected me and said that IS "who" she is. She told me that she was in a play off Broadway and every day went to work, bent her butt over to the audience while her co-star fanned his hand to it saying "her heart's as big as Texas" and the entire audience would laugh--at her, at the size of her butt. She was humiliated, FAT and hated it. Well, I said that may be, but that I need to learn more about HER and who she is, not just what her body looked like. So, after 2 weeks of hating me and cursing me and crying everytime she sat and tried to type a new list, she finally came up with a new one: Magical, gifted, spiritual, loving, talented, determined, loyal, sensitive,... WOW! Side by side, you would NEVER in a million years guess the 2 lists were from the same person much less in the span of only 2 weeks! Was she still overweight when she wrote the 2nd list? Did she still have "fat" on her body which needed addressing? Sure, of course she did--but she was immediately changed for the better when she realized that WHO she was matters far more than WHAT she LOOKS like. She went on to lose a great deal of weight and is successfully keeping it off. I believe it is because she stopped defining herself as FAT and started defining herself with more empowering words.

Many of the women who seek out my advice use the word FAT when inintially describing or defining themselves. I think that HOW we view ourselves, the words we choose to define ourselves without a doubt affect the outcome of not only our lives, but our weight loss journey.

If a stranger on the street called me FAT I would cry. If a loved one called me FAT I would be very upset with them. If I called myself FAT, I would believe it and become depressed about the appearance of my body and likely eat one of my vices in a futile attempt at comforting my hurt feelings. So, if you think your body has fat on it, take some steps towards changing your habits that support that fat. If you think "YOU" are FAT, it's time to take an inventory and discover WHO you really are and define yourself in an empowering way, with words that are more likely to lift you up rather than drag you down. I think that way you will be more likely to lose weight rather than just be perpetually starting another diet !

My challenge to you is to be very careful how you define yourself, because those words really do effect the outcome of your "diet" and the changes that you will see. If you are "FAT" going into your weight loss journey , odds are you are going to stay FAT. But, if your fat is simply a physical condition to be dealt with; it is likely that it will be!